There are many things that I have not been talking about with my blog because it has been a sensitive issue. Not the least of these is Endrit and I becoming parents. We want to become parents. We really do. As far as actually trying we haven't been trying 100%. We have gotten pregnant twice in our married life. One of those times was a couple of weeks ago. I have never been able to carry a pregnancy for more than a few weeks. I have never even made it to the doctor before I miscarried. It is miserable. That is why when Endrit and I went to the temple and received the directive to adopt we were excited about it. Then came the costs. It seems impossible that we will be able to afford the adoption. We know that we are adopting internationally from Albania. We have children there waiting. I feel that with all of my heart. That is why I was surprised when we got pregnant. We are now at the choice of waiting to adopt and having our biological child first, or biting the financial bullet and adopting before we have children of our own.
I honestly don't want to make my children wait in Albania for us to get the funding. We have gone too far in this direction to disregard all of our experiences and switch gears. We have thought about it. We have even planned for it when we got pregnant.
So, we step forward with faith. It is right and that is all that we need to know. We pay tithing and have faith. That is all that we can do.
7/30/10
7/22/10
Two Sides To A Coin
As I go into teaching, I have to think about my personal philosophy of teaching. I have worked at a struggling school with a struggling demographic. While there I have learned to love teaching that demographic of student. I sometimes wish that there was a little bit more, but there are some things that you learn more from and that school was one that taught me many great lessons.
There is a school that I interviewed at is in almost every way the opposite of where I have been teaching. Although it may sound like a dream job to some, it has me questioning if it is a good fit for me. In one way (my personal philosophy of teaching) it is NOT for me. In another way (my gaining of knowledge) it is PERFECT for me.
I have to be able to think of the future. What I do now will either help or hinder me in my future career goals. If I stay at one type of school I will not learn how to teach in different environments. If I teach in polar opposite schools, I have the learning, but not necessarily the enjoyment. I would LOVE to get a job at a school that is a nice happy medium between the far extremes, but I am not so confident that I will be able to find that kind of job.
So, If I get the job, do I take it and learn from it as much as I can, or do I pass it by and stick with my teaching philosophy? I am still unsure as to what that answer is going to be. If I don't get the job the answer is easy, keep looking. If I get the job...it gets a little bit harder. I know that the school will be wanting an answer that day. I have to decide what I am going to do.
7/19/10
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