BIG news!!

I have been talking about this school Salt Lake Center for Science Education, or SLCSE, and how I want to student teach there for a while. If you haven't, I have wanted to teach there for over a year now. Stellar teachers with SO much for me to learn from them. The beginning of the semester made me mad when my professor told me that SLCSE was not on the list of approved schools to student teach at. I was not going to take that sitting down so I nicely but firmly went to the proper authorities to see if the school would be put on the list.

Today the school is on the list! I will be meeting with the teachers that I could be working with for the next year, soaking up all the knowledge I can. I couldn't be happier right now! As a hopeful middle school science teacher, I believe that this is the best environment to learn the best teaching strategies possible to hook kids on science. Middle school science charter, here I come!

And Then Summer Ends

It was a fun summer for school. I was able to get over 100% in both classes that I took. My GPA went from 3.337 to 3.393. After next semester I should be back in the 3.4 range. I know it may be petty, but that is something that I really do take pride in.

Now it is on to my first semester for my cohort year of student teaching. I have every textbook bought and tuition is payed. It will be a fun semester. I have 12 credit hours. I am taking my last general education class. It is funny to see a 1010 class in the midst of three 5000 level classes.

Come November, I apply for both my Bachelors graduation and my Masters program. It may be earlier than that, but that is my timescale.

Anti-social

I looked back and the 1-2 posts per day on this blog have been lacking this summer. I know that there are reasons behind it. I have decided I don't really like my life being too far out there on the internet (not enough to make me put this on private again; but still). I have enjoyed reading my books. I have enjoyed the summer. It has really built me up to start my student teaching year. So, I have been able to go into those parts of my life and become the anti-social person that I really would rather be.

I don't fit in with peers. I don't truly fit in with my family most of the time. I only have one part of my life that I truly fit with and that is Endrit. We don't have friends, and that is okay by us since he is every bit as anti-social as I am. I had my second anxiety attack in church this Sunday and couldn't get through Sunday school. I almost left Relief Society. I think I would have had a complete breakdown if I even looked at the sacrament meeting crowd. Maybe I am feeling useless after I don't have a calling anymore. I want to go back to Princeton ward; but that is beside the point.

I haven't called anyone in 2 weeks. I don't like to receive phone calls all that much. I have written a couple of emails, but those were for letters of recommendations and asking if I could observe/student teach at their school. It wasn't one of those personal emails.

So, if anyone has noticed this, you are not being singled out. I am consistently avoiding anyone and everyone possible. I like to just sit in the back and watch sometimes. This is the longest I have been in this mood. Usually stress comes with talking things out in some way shape and form, but it doesn't seem that it is working itself out in the manner that I am used to.

I am fine. I am just not all mentally there right now. I have a one-track mind with school and that is all I am allowing myself to face at this point. It is my 6th year of school without the end coming with my bachelors, which right now I wouldn't even consider being a bad thing. Going to graduate school is the only thing that truly isn't a stressful part of my psyche. I have had trouble coming to terms with what I will do after I am done with school.

2 more years of mental preparation is more than worth it, even if I am truly ready at that point to face the world outside of university at that point. I might just have to keep going to school. I am not ready to move to the next step; at all. I am content with the status quo.

So, I may screen my calls. I may not answer emails. I may just become completely involved in school and that is how it is supposed to be; for me...right now. I am not depressed. I am just ambivalent towards most situations and people right now. There is nothing that needs to be said or done. It took a lot out of me to write the blog about Jimmy so I don't think I will be writing on here much. It just isn't worth the mental stress to think that people actually read my blog and care that I have been slowing down. I can't even bring myself to write about cleaning the temple although it was wonderful.

I will be back at some point, but I wouldn't hold my breath thinking that it is going to be soon. Check back in a couple of years maybe.

Jimmy

Okay, I know that my cats are weird. That will always be true. We couldn't have cats with more different personalities. Dexter likes to just lay around. He runs and plays, but he also knows how to find the softest pillow in the house and sleep the day away like a cat should. Jimmy on the other hand is crazy all day mostly. He is more of a napper. He sleeps for a bit and then runs around like crazy. Also, Dexter is a picky eater. He is a cat food or human food that is meat. He never begs. Jimmy...well, he begs for nectarines, rice, veggies, practically anything that Endrit and I are eating. He jumps on us and begs and when we rarely give in, he eats it. He stole the top of a tomato and ate the whole thing. He has stolen a nectarine pit to lick it. He is so funny. If we wanted to he would only eat people food, but we don't like hardly ever giving in to his begging. He is just funny.

SLC Public Library

I just wanted to brag about my library. Not only is it beautiful, but it is well stocked. There is always a quiet place to sit and read. The best part is the hold desk. You go online and pick out the books you want and place them on hold at the library and you don't have to physically look for the book you want. Also, since there are 5 libraries in the SLCPL system, if the book isn't at the library you want, they will ship it to where you want to place it on that holdshelf. It is awesome.

Last Day of Summer School

Today I go to my last class for summer school. I couldn't be happier. This summer has been MUCH more restful than last summer, but I kind of like resting before Fall semester starts. This Fall is going to be interesting.

I have an online class, a "pre cohort" class that should have been done already (oops) and my student teaching prep classes that are 7:30 AM classes. It will be interesting. I am glad that I (for the most part) like school.

But, in the 3 weeks I have before the semester starts I have several books to read and 5 lbs to loose. I will have time for the gym again. I have already read 5 leisure books this summer along with the reads for the class. I have 4 more that I have already picked out. I haven't been too disappointed with my reads. I have decided that the Salt Lake Public Library is my friend. I have checked out tons of books from there.

So, this summer has been fun. I don't think I could have handled it if I wasn't in classes. I have to stay busy or I am just too bored. So, now is the time to order my textbooks and sell the ones I had from this summer. Fun times. I am glad that I am done with my class today.

The Temple

The temple never ceases to amaze me. I am glad that Endrit and I have always lived within a couple of hours of a temple. It has been one of the biggest blessings of our marriage. Upon going to the temple our first times, Endrit and I made the goal of going once a month. To this day we have kept that promise to each other. 4 years and 3 months so far for Endrit and 4 years and 6 months for me. With the temple cleaning at the SLC temple this month and family visits, we almost missed this month. We were able to go to the 7:00 pm session today. We always feel so peaceful and uplifted while we are there. Today was one of the more peaceful sessions that I have had the opportunity to go through. Life has been a little rough for the last month and a half since we have gone. Endrit has his pre-oral that he is preparing for and I am entering my last year of my bachelors while doing summer school. It has been hectic. We went through and got everything confirmed that it will all work out and that we are on the specific path that the Lord wants us on.

I love knowing that I have the Lord on my side. I love knowing that I can turn to Him in all things big and small. I love personal revelation and peace in knowing that you are doing the right things for YOU. I love praying in the temple and feeling as close to God as I can on this Earth.

I had a great night. My heart is full. I am ready for the next month of challenges before I will have the priviledge to enter the temple again. I am excited for the 10th of August. I will have the opportunity to go to the temple on a Monday in order to clean it. I know it is only vaccuming or slight painting, but it is something that I can do physically for the Earthly home of the Lord.